Can You Say Cliche ?
by IndiLovesJasperHale
Summary: A collection of cliches I have found while reading fanfiction. I was bored and its good fro writer's Block!Anyway have fun reading it! Any suggestions? PM me!


**Read, Very Important.**

**Hey everyone! It's me! I'm sorry I haven't been updating the other story. It's because I'm having writers block and I need a beta!!! If anyone could suggest a good beta, or volunteer… it would be nice. This story will be updated whenever I can or whenever I have no ideas for my other story. Sorry you guys but by Saturday, you guys will have a new chapter up for Screams in the Dark. Now without further ado, I present my new story, Can You Say "Cliché"? In my story I'm going to talk about random clichés I read or wrote my self. I'm not trying to be mean, even my story is a cliché, must be at least 20 stories like mine if not more! If you read any clichés pr have any ideas for one, please PM me or leave a review! Thank you guys for reading this reeeeaaallly long AN.**

**Edward the Playa and Bella the Nerd**

_A classic cliché dating back to the beginning of time, where Bella is…well Bella, Edward is an asshole, Rose is a bitch/slut, Emmett is an idiot, Jasper is emo, and Alice is an energizer bunny on crack._

**Bella's first day**

**Edward: **I'm too sexy for my shirt, too sexy for my car, too sexy by far.

**Bella: **I'm a nerd. –sob- Life is so cruel! I need a schedule!

**Edward: **Even though it's the middle of the year, I need to change my schedule.

**Bella: **Oh hello lady behind the counter!

**Lady Behind the counter: **Hey Bella!

**Bella: **How do you know my name?!?!

**Lady Behind the Counter: **Lucky guess, anyway, here's your schedule.

**Bella: **Thank you! –turns towards door then trips- Oops!

**Edward: **-enters room in time to see her trip, and catches her- Gotcha!

**Bella: **Oooh! My eyes! I'm blind! He's too sexy for my eyes.

**Edward: -**drops Bella and digs in pocket for compact- My hair is still fine.

**Bella: **-leaves office while rubbing behind-

**Edward: **-still looking in mirror walks into door while attempting to leave-

**Lady behind the counter: **-shakes her head and wonders why she didn't become an accountant.

_Bella's class before lunch_

**Alice: **Hi! My name is Alice! Can I show you around school? Yes? Thank you!

**Bella: **-who didn't even say anything yet- Ummm, sure.

**Alice: **You will sit with me at lunch. Not a request, but an order! –threatens Bella with a sharpened pencil-

**Bella: **Ok. –shrinks back in fear of the pencil-

**Alice: **Yay! –jumps about three meters into the air-

_At Lunch_

**Alice: **-escorting Bella to the table, hissing at anyone who gets too close- Hi guys! This is Bella!

**Jasper: **Why! Why! –cries black tears and uses his plastic fork to cut is wrists-

**Rosalie: **-pulls condom from her pocket and attempts to sell it to Bella- 25? Ok, 15.

**Emmett: **-puts fingers to his head and begins to shake from the effort of thinking- Uhhhhhh, 17!

**Edward: **-too busy sucking face to notice any of this going on-

**Alice: **Come on, let's go get lunch! –drags Bella away from freak table-

**Edward (from across cafeteria): **Sorry Jessica but I only screw names A-H at lunch on Mondays, sorry!

**Alice: **Oh yeah, I forgot. –pulls out script, clears throat- That's my brother, and he's a real playa from the hood, Daddy-o. Better stay away from him. At least you aren't drooling after him.

**Bella:**- stands there in her own puddle of drool-

_Time for Biology (oh my!)_

**Edward: **-sucking face with random chick-

**Bella: **-sees Edward and wipes drool from face- Hey! Asshole! I'm right here!

**Random Chick: **Like, oh my gosh, did she like, call THE Edward Cullen, a like, ass, like, hole?!?!?!?

**Edward: **Your point is?

**RC: **See you in the back of your car, Edward –winks conspicuously and sneers at Bella-

**Bella: **She wasn't who you were sucking face with at lunch! –Gasp- You're a playa!

**Edward: **-smirks- If you want a turn all you have to do is ask. B is between A and H.

**Bella: **No shit Sherlock! It looks like you have at least ONE brain cell.

**Edward: **-still smirking- You look so sexy when you're pissed. It turns me on.

**Bella: **-Drags Edward into broom closet in the middle of the classroom.-

**Mike: **That sooooo did not happen.

**Jessica: **All the skinny girls have the luck.

_One our later…_

**Edward: **-sucking face with Jessica-

**Bella: **Oh my god Edward! Did our hour in the broom closet mean nothing?

**Edward: **Actually it was the best sex I've ever had; I'm just too scared to admit it.

**Bella: **-clearly shocked- Oh, well, What do we do now?

**Edward: **-takes Bella's hand and they skip off into the sunset-

**Jessica: **Shit. MIIIIIIIKKKKKEEEEEEEEYYYYY! There's a broom closet with our name on it!

**Well folks, Thanks for reading this. If you read a cliché today or any other day and want me to put it up, then like I said above, pm or put it in a reveiw! SITD by Saturday. Love Y'all!**


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